What a Year It Has Been

It seems like every December, stories abound recapping all the events, large and small, that have defined the year then coming to a close. We'd all have to agree that 2009 has been quite a year, although most of TNB's predictions (see December 31, 2008 post) unfortunately didn't pan out, not surprising when you consider they were made tongue in cheek. A prediction that Oprah would announce the end of her talk show came true except that she didn't state that the main reason was that she was fed up with lying authors. Also, we're not quite sure if the prediction that Barack Obama would resume smoking (assuming he really had quit) came true or not. But who cares? Look at the unpredictable (and unpredicted) things that did happen such as:

• The Octomom giving birth to 8 babies apparently artificially conceived. Can cloning of humans be far behind?
• Susan Boyle, obscure British plain Jane, becoming a singing sensation.
• Gov. Mark Sanford of South Carolina taking a hike up the Appalachian Trail and winding up in Argentina. (Wife Jenny just told him, through her divorce lawyers, to take a hike).
• Bernie Madoff winding up in a Federal prison in North Carolina with a 150 year sentence or about 3 years for each BILLION $ that his victims lost to his fraud.
• Michael Jackson, the self-styled King of Pop, dying suddenly apparently from a sleeping potion gone wrong (administered by his personal physician!)
• Tom DeLay, disgraced former House majority leader, making a huge fool of himself on "reality show" Dancing With the Stars.
• Patti Blagojevich, wife of disgraced former Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich (no slouch at making a fool of himself on TV and radio) making a huge fool of herself by allegedly swallowing insects on "reality show" I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here.
• All sorts of idiotic reality show wannabees (the Salahis, balloon boy parents, etc.) achieving their 15 minutes of fame while the media lusted after them.
• Modern day pirates, absent the cachet of Johnny Depp or even Capt. Hook, terrorizing the high seas more or less with impunity.
• Tiger Woods, king of not only golf but of celebrity commercialism, slipping so badly from his absurdly elevated image, that his only possible redemption will be to appear on Oprah's final show (in 2011!) with Elin in hand (probably $100 million richer), doing a public mea culpa and receiving a hug and absolution from the real Queen (forget about Elizabeth).

Can 2010 be any crazier? Stay tuned.

The Reality of TV

The recent news that major cable provider Comcast is (subject to Federal government approval)acquiring a 51% interest in NBC Universal, which of course includes the iconic National Broadcasting Company, is a little unsettling.

In addition to the possible ultimate loss of the NBC brand (just like Sears Tower and Marshall Field's) there appears to be a real threat to the position of broadcast TV vs. cable, which of course is Comcast's business. Although NBC for example has a strong news division, its entertainment sector is hurting badly --no more "must see TV" as in the heyday of Seinfeld, Cheers and ER. In fact, most of the highly rated broadcast shows on all 4 major networks are so-called reality shows, generally cheaper to produce and catering to all manner of TV watchers.

Where would broadcast TV be without the likes of the Survivor franchise, American Idol, Dancing With the Stars, The Biggest Loser, etc? The latter show incidentally has been plagued by accusations of dangerous weight loss techniques, fake scales, etc. Many other "reality shows" are obviously scripted (how about the various Apprentice programs?).

The scariest (saddest?) phenomenon has been the emergence of a new sub-class of "reality wannabes" ranging from the Hennes of balloon-boy infamy to the Salahis of gate crasher infamy. Michaele Salahi was apparently hoping to land a spot on something called "Real Housewives of Washington DC". BTW, does this mean that all other housewives are unreal? Just asking.

Given the irresistible lure of appearing in front of a TV camera (even looking stupid) for a huge number of Americans, don't expect the latest news (Comcast/NBC) to improve the quality of programs on broadcast TV. Look for scripted dramas, etc. to gradually continue to morph onto cable so that the only person you'll recognize on network TV will be your neighbor.

Obfuscation

Obfuscation can be defined as something deliberately unclear or unintelligible. While we are all subjected to daily (hourly?) attempts to obfuscate, particularly by politicians, the art of doing so has perhaps reached new heights lately. Consider:

TIGER WOODS--The P.R. damage from his 3 AM encounter with a fire hydrant and tree (and perhaps his wife's wrath)has escalated exponentially with each attempt to obfuscate by his agent, lawyers, spin doctors, spokespersons (even his mother-in-law in Sweden has one), friends, neighbors, gofers and generally anyone purporting to speak on his behalf, since he won't. The carefully crafted image, which helps to rake in millions in endorsements (along with his undeniable golf prowess)is rapidly eroding which means that when Tiger inevitably has to appear again in public in early 2010 (unless he's quitting the tour!)a new, improved round of obfuscation will no doubt emerge. WANTED: Master Obfuscator. Fee, no problem.

WHITE HOUSE CRASHERS-- While appearing (without compensation, they were quick to note) on the Today Show, Michaele and Tareq Salahi "answered" Matt Lauer's direct question of who invited them to last week's State dinner by replying that it was up to the Secret Service's timetable as to when they produced the evidence. For a high degree of obfuscation, not to mention gigantic chutzpah, the Salahis are hereby awarded the TNB 2009 Liars of the Year prize, consisting of 2 tickets to the next World Series game at Wrigley Field.

SAMMY SOSA-- Just when you thought Sammy reached the zenith in obfuscation several years ago when he stonewalled a Congressional committee investigating steroids use in baseball by pretending he didn't understand English (he brought along an interpreter)he now wants us to believe that his skin has turned accidentally white because of some special cream he needed to combat the effects of playing day baseball at the aforementioned Wrigley Field. Next bit of obfuscation will no doubt attempt to explain his corked bat.

It's getting difficult to believe anything (except of course what you read here).