Was 2011 Really Worse

In a posting on January 4, 2011 entitled "Can 2011 Be Worse" TNB lamented how terrible a year 2010 had been and predicted (somewhat tongue-in-cheek) what might happen in 2011, which of course couldn't possibly be worse than 2010, or could it?

Unlike many other prognosticators who never revisit their predictions TNB is going to "man up" (don't you love those ads?) and expose those forecasts one year later.

• Republicans will fail to repeal the Obama health care bill. This was accurate but TMB failed to foresee just how obstructionist the GOP could be, almost totally paralyzing the country on several occasions all with one goal in mind--defeat the President for reelection and to hell with everything else. How delicious would it be if this didn't happen in 2012? Too close to call.


• Clarence Thomas will resign from the Supreme Court. Sadly, this didn't occur but hope springs eternal.


• Rahm Emanuel will be elected Chicago mayor. This was sort of a no-brainer but once Rahm moved into his own house (reclaiming it from his tenant) he also scrapped his plans (?) to move City Hall to Manny's Deli. But he's off to a great start and watch out for him on the 2016 presidential ticket.


• Christine O'Donnell (remember her?) will pay off her campaign debt by autographing Halloween witch hats. Does anybody know if this happened? Delaware is pretty obscure (sorry, VP Biden).


• Colin Firth will stammer through his Oscar acceptance for The King's Speech. He of course did win and spoke perfectly--Brits always do.


• Brett Favre will finally retire from the NFL (he did) and will become a spokesperson for feminine hygiene products (you didn't actually believe this).


• The Chicago Cubs will finish 6th. They tried but "thanks" to the Houston Astros were 5th again. However brighter days appear ahead with the new management team headed by Theo Epstein. No more predictions--don't want to put a curse on them.

All in all, not a bad record. But TNB did fail to predict the tsunami in Japan, NY representative Anthony Weiner showing his on You Tube (that's what it means?), the deaths of Osama Bin Laden and Muammar Gaddafi, the rise (and fall) of Herman Cain and worst of all, the very recent passing of North Korea's "Dear Leader" who among other feats reported to his people, bowled a 300 game on his first try, made 11 holes in one on his first round of golf and dunked a basketball while blindfolded and chained (OK, TNB made up the last one).

You be the judge if 2011 was really worse. TNB predicts that 2012 will be better--why not?

Those Commie Muppets

At least once every day TNB is thankful for Fox News, protector of the Real America. Just this week the Fox Business Channel disclosed that Disney's new Muppets movie is nothing but a liberal commie plot to subvert the innocent minds of the unsuspecting kids who will watch it since they're too naive to realize that it contains an insidious anticapitalist message. Huh? It seems that the movie's villain who wants to take away the Muppets somewhat neglected property is an oilman who of course wants to (gasp) drill, baby, drill. Thus this so-called children's "entertainment"portrays an obvious job creator in a somewhat negative light. Must be a left wing conspiracy designed to poison those impressionable minds. Good to know that Fox is alert and on the job 24/7.

Actually Fox News should really be occupied with a far more important matter--how to get the country to elect Newt Gingrich president. Now that the GOP conservative base has lost Herman Cain (to the chagrin of comedians everywhere) it appears that the current flavor du jour is the former House speaker who has more baggage than a Samsonite store. Mainstream Republicans like Karl Rove abhor Gingrich knowing that he is likely to self-destruct sooner or later (didn't he just call for poor 10 year olds to do janitorial work?). Despite his lack of principles, spine, etc. Mitt Romney (ugh) might be the last person standing forcing GOP voters to hold their noses while voting for him, if they care to.

But wait--look who might be re-emerging. None other than the Donald, as in Donald Trump who announced that if the eventual nominee isn't satisfactory to him, he'll just take his ball and go home--sorry, he'll run as an independent. That would be great for President Obama since otherwise GOP votes would be siphoned off--sort of like what Ralph Nader did to Al Gore in 2000. It would also be great for comedians--easily compensation for the departure of Cain.

Yes, Fox News--this is where you should be concentrating and leave TNB's grandchildren to enjoy their popcorn and movies in peace.

11/11/11

Many years ago, when TNB's late mother was about to deliver, she unfortunately didn't hurry up by about a half hour so that instead of being born on the mundane date of 11/12, he could have been celebrating a birthday on 11/11/11. Those of you old enough to remember when Veterans Day was Armistice Day, commemorating the end of World War I, will recall that the exact time the armistice was signed (11:11 AM) gave further significance to the numerology of the date.

Of course 11/11/11 is so intriguing a date that huge numbers of couples are apparently rushing to get married today (the mere fact of marriage is especially significant considering our present society). For many of these couples 11/11/11 conveys something spiritual. However considering certain recent events TNB (ever the cynic) is having difficuty channeling this.

There obviously wasn't much spirituality (or morality) exhibited at Penn State where the disgusting child sex abuse scandal (and more disgusting aftermath) just exploded. The "legendary" coach Joe Paterno, whose pedestal certainly cracked, and all the school administrators who like those from the Catholic Church and others were only interested in protecting the institution first (and the perp second) and never mind the innocent victims, have had a swift and deserved fall from grace. Very telling was that 4 of the 9 members of Penn State's Board of Trustees who fired JoePa the other night formerly played for him.

But what rankled TNB the most was the reaction of many in Penn State's student body who rioted to protest the dismissal. Wouldn't you love to pay say $40,000 per year to send your child to college only to have he or she behave like that? Worse yet, no one protested the concurrent ouster of the university president. Why should they--the head football coach usually earns far more and when you think about it, they're both primarily fund raisers--bringing in all that cash so that tuition can be kept "low"!

Another example of what makes America so great and why other countries are surpassing us in so many ways--our values are all screwed up. Sorry to ruin the spirituality of 11/11/11.

The Eight Little Dwarfs

TNB was amazed at how small all the leading Republicans (the Presidential candidates, Senators like McCain and Graham, Eric Cantor, etc.) appeared when the announcements were made on successive days last week of the death of Muammar Ghaddafy and the upcoming final withdrawal of troops from Iraq . Just like when Osama Bin Laden was tracked down and killed, with of course 100% of the credit going to George W. Bush, this time it was either the British and French who alone brought down the Libyan colonel or Obama's exit strategy from Iraq that was a total failure (wasn't it Bush who agreed in December 2008 to bring the troops home by this December?). And by the way, Rick Perry has "revived" the birther issue only to be severely publicly reprimanded by, of all people, fellow Texan Karl Rove.

If the President announced that cancer had been eradicated, he would get no credit from any of these little people --who all resemble mental midgets. Too bad there are still 8 presidential candidates--the group would be perfect for the remake of the 1937 Disney classic Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. Wait a minute --why not eliminate Jon Huntsman who is going nowhere, doubtlessly because he seems to be both reasonable and (gasp) qualified. So this leaves us with this Oscar worthy cast:

Bashful A perfect role for Mitt Romney who is perpetually shy about sticking to one opinion.
Doc Strangely, Ron Paul does have a medical license.
Dopey A natural for Michele Bachmann.
Grumpy The character was obviously written with Newt Gingrich in mind.
Happy Herman Cain is positively ecstatic at the P.R his ludicrous campaign has created.
Sleepy Is there a better antidote for insomnia than Rick Santorum?
Sneezy There must be some Texas sized allergies that have so clouded Rick Perry's "brain".

You're wondering about Snow White? Who better to portray the innocent virgin than Sarah Palin (or maybe Bristol).

Now you know why Chris Christie loomed so large, in more ways than one.

Dream Matchups

• After several weeks of blog inactivity, partially caused by a bad computer crash (watch out for viruses embedded in mysterious E-Mails) TNB is pleased to report that some semblance of order has come to the race for the 2012 Republican presidential nomination. During this period we have witnessed the rise and fall (self imposed) of New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie who went from a somewhat obscure hugely overweight obnoxious politician to a much better known hugely overweight obnoxious politician. Christie has just endorsed Mitt Romney who has done more flips than an Olympic gymnast on a woman's right to choose, health care and just about anything else that might endear him to the far, far right wing.
  
  Also during this time, Rick Perry has slipped greatly, partially because he has had to speak and not just swagger --OMG it's another George W. Bush, his predecessor as Texas governor. Maybe Texas can merge with Mexico to whom of course they once belonged. Probably Perry was not helped by the "shocking" revelation that his family once operated a ranch named Niggerhead. This has helped the inexplicable rise of Herman Cain who just might be the most inept of all the GOP candidates, which is saying something when the field includes Rick Santorum and Michele Bachmann.
  
  TNB, the ultimate cynic as you all know, cannot fathom that there could really be a race between Cain and Barack Obama. Although when you think of it, this potential All-Black contest might just be a sort of "dream matchup". And if you really think about it (and have a mind as strange as TNB) why not for example some other dream matchups:
  


• All-Jewish ---Rahm Emanuel vs. Eric Cantor. Can't you just anticipate that each of their bar mitzvah speeches will appear on the Internet along with a list of their "donors" back then, i.e. who gave them gifts? Scandalous!



• All-Trailer Trash---Hank Williams, Jr. vs. Sarah Palin. Even though neither one's a Democrat they do represent rednecks from both the South and North. And BTW, are you as fed up as TNB is with the trivialization of Hitler, one of history's Top Ten monsters? It seems as no insult is complete these days without comparing the insultee to Adolf Hitler. Disgusting!


• All-Outrageous Celebrity---Lady Gaga vs. Kim Kardashian. OK, neither one is even 35 years old but who cares? They would be perfect as politicians--despite their shallowness, the public is mesmerized. Nauseating!

Is this the best we can do? Sadly, the answer might be yes.

Goodnight Irene

Hurricane Irene, which wreaked devastating floods on the Mid-Atlantic and New England brought to mind the classic folk song Goodnight Irene, popularized some 60 years ago by the Weavers. While the unfortunate residents cleaning up are saying Goodnight Irene (and good riddance), TNB would like to add some other goodnights (and good riddances) to certain natural disasters we've had to endure:

• Goodnight Michele Is the end nearing for the pitiful presidential campaign of Michele Bachmann? Her latest gaffe, which blamed the hurricane (and the earlier East Coast earthquake) on God taking vengeance on Washington for "not listening"(????) reminds TNB that she is the only candidate so stupid that Sarah Palin actually looks good. A swift goodnight, please!


• Goodnight Dick Unfortunately Darth Vader Cheney is back-- this time with (of course) a self-serving memoir which he promised "would explode heads around Washington". Was he planning to shoot someone in the face again? TNB's major regret is that allegedly he offered his resignation three times in 2004 and W. did not have the courage to accept. As they used to close the old Laugh-In show "Say goodnight Dick".


• Goodnight Muammar They still can't find the two bit tyrant responsible for hundreds of American deaths among many others? There can't be that many hiding places in the Libyan desert. About time to give Col. Gaddafi a goodnight tuck-in he'll be able to cherish forever.

Irene goodnight, Irene goodnight---Goodnight Irene, Goodnight Irene

I'll See You In My Dreams

Who Can You Believe

A friend of TNB recently posed the rhetorical question "Who Can You Believe?" to which the joking response was TNB, of course. But pondering this dilemma makes one realize that, especially if you tend to be skeptical by nature (or by profession considering that TNB was trained as an auditor) there's really not a lot to put your faith in anymore if indeed there ever was. Consider the following:

• Job Creators--- It's very difficult to believe that slightly increasing taxes on the very wealthy will prevent them from "creating jobs". Huh? Many of these people are in the financial services world, where the amount of their income (before or after tax) has no bearing on their ability or desire to create jobs. When one thinks about it, how is it possible for any politician (even a Republican) to radically change the employment picture when so many jobs have been permanently lost to outsourcing, technology and other factors that we have permitted to occur over the last 20 years or so under both parties.



• College Athletics---It's very difficult to believe that big-time college football (and basketball, to a lesser extent) is practiced by "student-athletes " who are not tainted by payoffs and other forms of cheating. And what about their coaches and some of the university administrators? The dollars involved are so huge and the temptation to skirt the rules is so strong that it's a wonder when a school's program is shown to be totally "clean" (usually it's a loser).



• Government Paralysis---It's very difficult to believe that our governments at all levels will ever operate in the best interest of the people. The extreme polarization, unwillingness to compromise and total self absorption (where the primary concern is with re-election, including raising obscene amounts of cash) sadly make it unlikely that the citizenry will ever again trust in their elected officials. Check out the polls ranking Congress, for example.

Does all this sound utterly cynical? Probably so--but it is tempered by the occasional good news such as the remarkable advancement in the treatment of the dreaded ALS (Lou Gehrig's disease), the overthrow of Muammar Ghaddafi and the Chicago Cubs firing of their general manager. Hope may not be springing eternal but there is still something to believe in.

Rahm Emanuel for President

Way back in 2008, both candidates vying for the Democratic presidential nomination had strong Chicago ties--Hillary Rodham Clinton, born in Chicago, raised in the suburbs and Barack Obama, born in Honolulu (really!) but who had spent his adult life here. Now with things going poorly, TNB is offering up another (lifelong) Chicagoan as a possible nominee (yes in 2012) for President--namely Mayor Rahm Emanuel. Consider his positives:

• Extensive and intensive experience--Three term Congressman (succeeded Rod Blagojevich!) and White House Chief of Staff (under Obama) before becoming mayor.


• Enormous appeal to Jewish voters (and donors)--historically Democratic but many leaning away from Obama because of mistaken impression that he is anti-Israel (Rahm's father born there).


• Most importantly-- has a documented record of being a relentless, tough, sometimes nasty politician who unlike Obama and Clinton has the required cojones needed to deal with the Tea Party and other crazies in this world (Hillary's lack of course is only biological).

Wait a minute--is TNB suggesting a divisive primary fight? Not at all--TNB's master plan is for Obama to voluntarily become Mayor of Chicago (never mind the details). What a great job for him--no mean Republicans to deal with (not in Chicago), lunch every day at Manny's, getting back to his lovely house (no idiotic renter to get rid of) only a stone's throw from the University of Chicago, where maybe he could at least part-time resume his academic career. Speaking of the U. of C., their lab school would do just fine for Malia and Sasha (Rahm's kids are enrolled there now).

Talk about a win-win situation. Odds, anyone?

Our Long National Nightmare

In August 1974 when Gerald Ford became President succeeding Richard Nixon (who resigned in disgrace from the Watergate scandal) he uttered the profound words "Our long national nightmare is over". And it generally was, save for Ford's subsequent pardon of Nixon.

Today when the latest national nightmare, the absurd, unnecessary battle over the simple act of raising the debt ceiling came to at least a pause, TNB recalled Ford's words realizing that this catastrophe is far from over. Consider:

• President Obama has been badly damaged by the revelation to even his most ardent supporters that while a fundamentally decent man (albeit of color) he is unable to stand up to the nasties (read: crazies) in the Republican Party. His 2012 reelection hopes rest squarely on 3 things--the economy, which lamebrain is his opponent (there are several perfect choices) and the economy.


• Republican House Speaker John Boehner (likewise probably a decent person) has been humiliated and gravely wounded by the extremists in his own party, thus making his future effectiveness also doubtful. Don't even mention his #2 (Eric Cantor) to TNB-- he often sounds like he's still giving his bar mitzvah speech.


• These nasty, crazy extremists (read: Tea Party) have managed to hold the U.S. government hostage to their "little or no government" platform. If their goal is to return this country to the actual Tea Party era (circa 1773), why not just go to colonial Williamsburg for a full costume re-enactment of those glory days? They really don't quite cut it in 2011 but they bizarrely have their followers. Scary!

Looks like a lot of bad dreams coming up for all of us. And TNB thought it was depressing being a Cubs fan.

Anglophiles

Anglophiles are people (mostly Americans) who greatly admire the British people, culture, customs, etc. And of course there is a lot to admire, but we do often tend to carry this fondness a bit too far. For example, people with English accents are often presumed to be at least one station above us Yanks. Some years ago, a lawyer acquaintance of TNB told him that his law firm could not fire an incompetent receptionist because her English accent greatly impressed their clients. Admit it! You subconsciously attribute some level of superiority to anyone speaking in those clipped British tones--or for that matter, using spelling like colour, centre, labour, etc. which sets them apart from the rest of us, who barely know how to use a knife and fork (differently, naturally) and drive on the left side of the road.

Then also of course there's the royal family, consisting generally of empty-headed, inbred individuals who while providing a sort of diversion from reality, hardly warrant the celebrity worship that we in the United States insist on lavishing on them (see: recent visit of William and Kate).

It is thus with a sense of schadenfreude (OK, so it's a German word meaning taking pleasure in someone else's misfortune) that TNB, and maybe some of you, have been following the fascinating news of the well-deserved troubles of the Murdoch media empire in the UK, resulting from hacking the phones of missing teenagers and families of military casualties and terrorist victims (not to mention the run-of-the-mill royals, government officials and other prominent people), bribing of police for scoops, intimidation of politicians, etc. After decades of enabling the scumbag British tabloid culture to flourish, sad to say, maybe our friends across the pond deserve a little black eye--maybe they won't be so smug about their former colonies.

And naturally this couldn't happen here; oh but wait a minute ---Murdoch does own Fox News who while not in the same league as the now defunct News of the World certainly attempts to intimidate politicians (read: Democrats) who don't agree with their right-wing politics. And also there's Murdoch's New York Post, a pale imitation of its UK siblings. They do get some unusual scoops (some of it is obviously made up).

Those Lefty Liberals

It's a source of constant amazement to TNB that the word "liberal" has become synonomous in some (read: Republican) circles with far-out, anti-American, godless creatures who eat their young when not turning into vampires at night. After all, the word only means someone who is open to new opinions and favorable to invididual rights and freedoms. But especially when paired with "lefty", the term is a rallying cry for the Real Americans (read: Tea Party) who want to "take back our country" (read: suppress minorities, eliminate a woman's right to choose, peer into every bed to make sure two people from the same gender are not occupying it, etc.).

In fact people who really are liberal are reluctant to use the term which has been generally replaced by the softer "progressive" which still of course rankles those who haven't come to grips that we're in 2011, not say 1911 when times were a lot simpler ( except for many of our immigrant forefathers who around that time weren't considered real Americans either).

Don't you wonder why the word "conservative" meaning adhering to traditional attitudes and cautious about change doesn't have the same negative connotation among people with opposite political views? Maybe the latter, being (OK here it comes) "liberal" just are nicer and more open-minded. OR maybe the lefties ought to resort to some nasty name-calling.

Why not start calling these people what they really are--fascists which is defined as those who hold extreme, intolerant views? But this won't happen. The Seven Little Dwarfs (oops--the announced Republican presidential candidates) will attack President Obama as a socialist and worse (see: Newt Gingrich). The Democrats will never resort in kind (see: Swift Boating, Willie Horton and other GOP election viciousness).

Unfortunately too many liberals just don't have the balls --Wait a minute, there is Anthony Weiner.

Vest On Fire

After beleagured Ohio State football coach Jim Tressel was forced to resign due to disclosure of a series of his lies and cover-ups concerning certain off-field behavior by some of his players, fans of archrival Michigan paid to erect a billboard (in Michigan of course) which stated in large red Ohio State letters "Liar Liar Vest on Fire", which was both a play on the childhood taunt "liar liar pants on fire" and a mocking of the trademark red vest always exhibited by Tressel. [Full disclosure: several members of TNB's family are ardent Michigan fans, and of course that school, along with Southern Cal, Auburn, Connecticut, etc. has had its share of bad behavior--often by sanctimonious, hypocritical head coaches--sort of an occupational hazard].

Big-time college sports, of course, is totally out of control, being "policed" by the incredibly ineffectual NCAA, which among other things, permitted 6 of Tressel's star players to play in this year's Sugar Bowl (after being pressured by the Bowl organizers) despite being suspended for part of next season for the very infractions that eventually led to Tressel's downfall. Just in case you're wondering what these huge revenue producing sports mean to universities (besides providing a "healthy learning environment" for the so-called student-athletes), you may be surprised that a few months ago during the Tressel investigation, Ohio State President Gordon Gee, when asked if he was going to fire the head coach replied "I hope he doesn't dismiss me" (honestly!). Gee's salary is $2 million compared to Tressel's now former compensation of $4 million but hey who brings in more money? (The president doesn't have any endorsements either).

Isn't it comforting to parents who cough up 50 grand or so per year for their child's education (or to students who need to borrow big sums) to realize that the most important "educator" is often the head football coach? Are our priorities screwed up or what?

Anyway, so that we don't all quickly forget whatever lessons might be taken away from this incident, TNB is establishing the Vest on Fire award, to be given annually to the biggest liar among public figures such as politicians, coaches, TV pundits and just about anybody well-known. Early nominees include Arnold Schwarzenegger, Rod Blagojevich, Karl Rove, Newt Gingrich, Sarah Palin and Tiger Woods. Jim Tressel is ineligible.

The Ugly Frenchman

The term Ugly American gained notoriety some years ago when it was generally used to refer to overbearing American tourists who didn't know how to properly conduct themselves overseas, especially in the postwar years when visiting the "more sophisticated " European countries, such as France (which of course we Yanks and our British friends saved from having to Sprechen Sie Deutsch forever).

Although France is inarguably a great place to see, the experience there is often spoiled by having to deal with the locals--sort of an entire population of Ugly Frenchmen, many of whom are rude and arrogant, not to mention guilty of the most disgusting habits such as "irregular" bathing, letting dogs poop up the sidewalks, revering Jerry Lewis, etc. But these sociological or cultural differences represented mostly harmless quirks (unless you're in an elevator with a Parisian on a hot day) until this week when mon dieu we Americans, in our simpleminded pursuit of justice, managed to offend the entire French nation.

Our sin? We dared to arrest a powerful French politician and (until yesterday) head of the International Monetary Fund, one Dominique Strauss-Kahn, known in his home country as DSK. Considered a leading (Socialist!) candidate to defeat President Sarkozy in the next election, DSK who was arrested for raping an African immigrant chambermaid in the Sofitel Hotel in Manhattan, recently told a French interviewer that his three main obstacles to becoming President were his wealth, his love of women (twice divorced and quite the alleged serial seducer) and his Jewishness.

At least in New York City , there haven't been any accusations of anti-Semitism in his jailing. But his sleazebag American lawyer (infamous for representing sleazebag celebs like Michael Jackson) has come up with a number of defenses trying to secure bail for DSK, while trying of course to shift blame to the victim,. Let's try consensual sex, a lunch date DSK had with his daughter (at the same time?), a set up by Sarkozy's people (using an uneducated 32 year old from Guinea??), etc. Gotta love his lawyer's imagination.

But putting all that aside, the real revelation has been the attitude of many Frenchmen, including portions of their media. How dare we uncivilized Americans march DSK in a photographed perp walk, lock him up in Rikers Island with "scum", offer him "bad food" and so on? In France, the high and mighty aren't treated this way. A discreet payoff --l'affaire is forgotten. TNB had almost forgotten just how Ugly Frenchmen could be until their media revealed the name of the poor victim--something we generally don't do here. Who's Ugly anyway??

Well Handled Sir

On Saturday evening April 30th, during what turned out to be the most satisfying week of the Obama presidency, the President appeared as is customary, at the annual White House Correspondents dinner. Despite what he and relatively few others knew was scheduled to occur within 24 hours in Pakistan, Obama appeared extremely relaxed as he positively skewered the "carnival barker" Donald Trump, windbag self-promoter and would be presidential candidate. Obama addressed the Donald, sitting grim faced in the audience, by stating how "impressed " he was with his presidential credentials, citing the tough decision he faced, no doubt keeping him up nights, as to whom to fire from his failed men's cooking team, before settling on hapless Gary Busey. Obama told Trump, with more than a hint of sarcasm , "well handled, sir".

As a fitting irony, the next night just as Trump's idiotic "reality" show Celebrity Apprentice was droning on to its climax it (and all other TV fare) was interrupted for the President's dramatic announcement of the killing of Osama Bin Laden. So in one weekend, Trump was shown to be totally irrelevant, which of course he always was.

Subsequently as more details became known about the operation, it finally put to rest (or should have) this idea put forth by the GOP (Grossly Obnoxious People) that Obama was some sort of indecisive wimp, unlike his cowboy predecessor whose apologists of course rushed to expound that it was really Bush who deserves most of the credit (?). Of course, since Obama is black it's not possible in the minds of an unfortunately sizable minority of Americans that he could possibly be effective (see: the birther nonsense).

In reality Obama is cautious and thorough whereas Bush was prone to rush to judgment (see: Iraq). TNB is very glad that we have this high quality individual as our President.

Well handled, sir!

Is it 2012 Yet?

Just when everyone (even Chicago area residents who just selected mayors, etc.) thought that the rest of 2011 might provide a needed respite from electioneering and politicking, there are some sure signs of Spring in an odd numbered year--the next election cycle is starting. It's "almost"2012 to politicians-- albeit so far without the repetitive, negative TV ads, flyers and robo calls--but don't be surprised to see them earlier than ever next year (or maybe as an early Christmas present). As this is being written, President Obama, with no primary opponent to worry about, is in his hometown of Chicago for 3 fundraisers, one featuring star Bulls guard Derrick Rose (also a hometown boy). And while his first two+ years in office have been somewhat rocky, Obama's reelection chances as of today don't look all that bad when you consider the probable Republican field.

Mitt Romney Dull is probably a compliment for Mitt who when governor of Massachusetts presided over a health care plan eerily similar to the much despised "Obamacare". BTW, did you notice that the GOP (Paul Ryan) proposed super-severe budget contains certain elements of that very same health care bill? What would hypocrisy be without politicians?

Mike Huckabee His appeal is mainly to "good ole boys" from rural areas and other simple minded folk. Wait a minute--the latter could be a majority of Americans . Ouch!

Newt Gingrich Possibly would face some searing "character issue" questions concerning two wives he dumped while each had medical problems. Also, he's not very personable, which of course is important if one hopes to get elected (see George W. Bush).

Sarah Palin Also has questions of character. Main appeal is to the "ignorance is bliss" (or blissfully ignorant) crowd which sadly (see Huckabee) is a voting bloc to reckon with.

Michelle Bachmann Sort of Sarah without all of the personal warts. Don't dismiss her so fast.

Donald Trump Riding to the rescue to save the party from the other mediocrities, the Donald has emerged as a viable candidate, despite the fact that his program largely consists of reviving the worn out "birther" issue and as any other great con man might do, totally obfuscating his qualifications (his string of failed businesses, his cheesy unreality show, his "style "which would no doubt go over well with world leaders, etc.). If he's being taken seriously by Republican voters the President can relax a little.

Unpredictable

In our society we are used to attempting to predict the future. Most obviously, the weather is predicted practically to the hour, if you care, and with the aid of modern technology usually the short-term (say 24 hours) forecast is reasonably accurate but as far as the say 7 day prognosis well, who really remembers it seven days later? Certainly not the weatherman.

High tech aids, however, aren't of much use for predicting most other events that significantly affect us. Even TNB in his (mostly tongue in cheek) 2011 forecast, published less than three months ago, utterly failed to sense that the following was going to occur before the first quarter of the year was over:

• The upheaval all across the Middle East and North Africa with a lot yet to be written. Will Gadhaffi go? Will he get asylum anywhere? Will Saudi Arabia be next? What will happen in Iran? If you read or hear any "expert" analysis on what's likely, forget it. No one knows (maybe the Shadow, for those of you old enough to understand).
• The earthquake, tsunami and resultant nuclear disaster in Japan. Sure the nuclear facility was built on a fault (practically all of Japan is) but to have such a "perfect storm" of events occurring would have surprised and baffled Nostradamus.
• The firing of Charlie Sheen from his top-rated TV sitcom Two and a Half Men. Charlie has been nothing but unpredictable of course but to witness such public self-destruction could not have been foreseen. And lest you think that his inclusion in this list trivializes it, who has gotten more attention-- Hosni Mubarak, Japanese Prime Minister Kan or that fascinating bad boy?

BTW, in TNB's defense, he did correctly predict Rahm Emanuel's election as Chicago mayor (OK--it was a slam dunk) but is still waiting for the rest of that prophecy to come true. Still no word on when Chicago City Hall will be moved to Manny's Deli but with David Axelrod back in town, still sounds like a good guess.

I'm Truly Truly Sorry

Have you ever noticed that no matter how irrational, offensive or downright mean an utterance might be when made by a politician it's readily "cured" by the perpetrator offering an effusive apology, sort of like saying "I'm truly truly sorry". How heartfelt or genuine the apology is, or for that matter whether it's been drafted by some hack spinmeister or not is irrelevant. As long as the media reports how sorry the person is, everyone quickly moves on. Well, not everyone--TNB is watching! He doesn't accept "I'm sorry" that easily. Consider:

• Right-wing idiot Glenn Beck had some tall explaining to do after he likened the political activism of Reform rabbis to Islamic extremism. When last seen, Beck was at his dentist having a portion of his foot extracted from his mouth.
• Redneck Georgia GOP Congressman Paul Broun "deeply regretted" not confronting a man (later investigated by the Secret Service) at one of his rallies who asked Broun "who's going to shoot Obama?" Broun, who for several years has compared the President to a Gestapo officer and worse, said that he was too stunned to react. Maybe he's a closet Ku Kluxer [that could be an oxymoron].
• Former Sen. Carol Moseley Braun belatedly and grudgingly apologized for falsely accusing one of her minor Chicago mayoralty opponents of being strung out on crack for the past 20 years. In this case "I'm sorry" didn't suffice and Braun sank to a dismal 4th place finish, with more members of her African-American community (deeply embarrassed by her remarks) voting for winner Rahm Emanuel rather than her. BTW-- Rahm's election is the first (maybe the last) of TNB's New Year's predictions to come true. But, as forecast, he might still move Chicago's City Hall to Manny's Deli.

Non-politicians, who don't have to face the voters aren't always so quick to offer their mea culpas. Troubled (to say the least) Charlie Sheen has not and probably never will take back the rant against his producer that caused Two and a Half Men to be cancelled by CBS. His rant included some barely veiled anti-semitic cracks about the producer. But apparently being a total sleaze in the entertainment world can be part of someone's "charm". Of course, do you remember Mel Gibson?

A Sucker is Born

A famous saying, rightly or wrongly attributed to master 19th century showman P.T. Barnum is of course "There's a sucker born every minute". Extrapolating that to today's population would more accurately state "There's a sucker born every few seconds" or whatever. But the pithy observation is probably even more valid 100+ years later. Consider the following recent high profile examples.

The debacle at Sunday's Dallas Super Bowl, whereby at least 400 patrons whose temporary seating (planned so that the total attendance might set an alltime record--it didn't) wasn't ready and who had to watch on television from an inside club room, resulted in these individuals being promised by the NFL a refund of triple their ticket's face value plus a free ticket to next year's Super Bowl. Nothing so unremarkable until you consider that such face value was $800 or $900 [some paid a lot more to legitimate ticket scalpers, or"brokers"] and counting the cost of travel, etc. many of these people might still not come out even. But the "sucker" element is in the face value itself. For marginal seating and views in a 100,000 seat stadium, people (i.e. suckers) were willing to shell out such sums! We're really in a recession? Maybe for the unlucky bottom 10-20% but apparently there are myriad thousands who whether they can really afford to or not, are caught up in the Super Bowl hype. Suckers indeed.

BTW, wasn't the perfect epitome of Texas size braggadocio gone amok with all the problems Dallas had in putting on the event, seeing George W. ("Mission Accomplished") Bush smugly sitting in a VIP seat?

Anyway, another sucker magnet has been the troubled $65 million Broadway extravaganza Spider- Man Turn Off the Dark. After months beset with mechanical issues, injuries to actors during performances and innumerable delays, the nation's theatre critics finally decided to review the show, although its official opening has been postponed yet again to March 15. The reviews ranged from "incoherent" to "a mess" to "a candidate for the worst musical in history" and you get the picture. But will this sink the show? Probably not--despite generally poor word of mouth to date and extremely high ticket prices up to $270, the show has been selling out and TNB wouldn't bet that this won't continue. One could argue that's it's the intellectually snotty critics vs. the comic strip loving "real Americans" such as TNB's "hero" Glenn Beck who has allegedly seen and loved the show 4 times [maybe he's an investor]. However, isn't this just a perfect instance of another several hundred thousand suckers being ripped off?

Make that a sucker born every millisecond.

News of the Day

As most of us in the Midwest and Northeast settle in for an oncoming vicious winter storm, thus causing airports, schools and businesses to declare a snow day for Wednesday, February 2, readers of this blog need to make sure that they're totally up to date on all of the news of the day, with of course TNB's accompanying analysis which is required to really understand what's going on:

• STATE OF THE UNION-- In addition to the "odd couples" caused by Senators and Representatives seated not by political parties but by the new rules of civility (McCain next to Kerry, etc.) we were treated to the Tea Party response. Rep. Michelle Bachmann sort of delivered her incoherent remarks while gazing to her right. No matter, she appears to have been tutored by Sarah Palin, in a classic example of dumb and dumber.
• TURMOIL IN EGYPT-- In another case of "but he's OUR dictator" (see Saddam Hussein with whom we sided in Iran/Iraq war in 1980's) it appears that the U.S. is going to let Hosni Mubarak float in space while hoping that his successors will be gracious enough to continue to accept $1.3 billion in aid from us.
• CHICAGO MAYORAL RACE -- At the end of an eventful week in which a bogus residency issue concerning frontrunner Rahm Emanuel saw him kicked off, then restored to the ballot, he was upstaged (sort of) by fellow mayoral candidate and former Senator Carol Moseley Braun, who falsely accused a minor opponent with "being strung out on crack for the past 20 years" and then took two days to apologize, thus further tarnishing her already shaky credibility.
• OSCARS-- After nominations were announced and all the pundits weighed in, it appears that the race for Best Picture will come down to an old fashioned historical drama The King's Speech and a new fashioned historical drama The Social Network. Probably will depend on who's doing the voting--admirers of the British royal family or admirers of the Internet. [TNB actually liked best the hallucinatory ballet movie Black Swan which has no historical significance].
• SUPER BOWL -- For Chicagoans the upcoming game is anticlimatic. The controversy over QB Jay Cutler's knee injury and toughness totally overshadowed how poorly the Bears played but it's way more fun watching Jay's knockout girlfriend going to dinner or shopping in LA with him anyway. Besides Chicago is getting Obama confidante David Axelrod back; soon to be seen at Manny's Deli. Life is good.

A Sense of Decency

The outpouring of emotion, opinions as to the cause(s) and other expressions of "wisdom" that have resulted from the Tucson shootings reminded TNB of a pivotal moment in American history which taught at the time some now largely forgotten lessons of conduct in a polarized society.

Over a half century ago, in 1954 to be exact, a demagogic senator, Joseph R. McCarthy (R-Wis), had made quite a name for himself by "outing", often unfairly or inaccurately, supposed Communists employed by the U.S. government. This is hard to understand today when Communist China practically owns our country and in general, the Red threat has largely vanished. But during the height of the Cold War, McCarthy was virtually unchallenged until he overreached by challenging the U.S. Army as to certain of its soldiers' loyalties.

At the famous televised Army-McCarthy hearings, the Senator was strongly rebuked by a patrician Boston-based attorney, Joseph Welch, whom the Army had engaged to represent it. After McCarthy had nastily tried to smear a young attorney in Welch's firm by bringing up some student associations, the courtly Welch delivered the famous lines ".. have you no sense of decency, sir? At long last, have you no decency...?" This exchange turned public opinion against McCarthy, who was censured by his Senate colleagues and died 3 years later, at age 47, of liver disease brought on by acute alcoholism.

When you really analyze today's political rhetoric, which may not bear much if any actual responsibility for the shootings, what stands out is the total lack of decency exhibited by many in public life. Or is the word "decency" as archaic as rotary phones, typewriters and common courtesy?

We need a Joseph Welch today (the real one died in 1960 at age 70). Someone who can stand up to today's demagogues, who are far more dangerous than back in 1954, due among other things to the ubiquity of the Internet and the far greater availability of assault type weapons among the general populace. Someone who could shame a Sarah Palin (assuming she possesses one gram of decency) for disseminating her "targets" containing rifle bullseyes (her spokesperson now claims that they're just surveyors sights!!) and aiming them at people who disagreed with her, such as Rep. Gabrielle Giffords. Indecent indeed.

Can 2011 Be Worse

Early in each year (you know, before the New Year's resolutions have worn off) there's usually a cautious sense of optimism about the upcoming 12 months. Most people can't possibly foresee that 2011 could be as bad as 2010-- a year which included, among other disasters, the Haiti earthquake, the BP oil spill, the (hopefully temporary) rise of Sarah Palin and the Tea Party, the 5th place finish of the Chicago Cubs, etc.

Fortunately for those pessimists among you, TNB is not "most people". He has his usual sense of foreboding which, not to depress you too much, he is not reluctant to share with you. Watch for some of the following to take place (no reminders, please next December at those which didn't materialize):

• Republicans will fail to repeal the Health Care Bill but when planning their 2012 re-election campaigns, will pretend that they have, thus impressing enough of their ignorant followers to assure that they're not deservedly tossed out of office.
• Clarence Thomas will shockingly resign as the silent Supreme Court Justice to spend more time with his wife in pursuing Anita Hill for disclosing his perversions during 1991 confirmation hearings. After a bitter , divisive Senate battle over his successor, Denzel Washington will emerge as the consensus choice over Oprah Winfrey.
• Rahm Emanuel will be elected as Chicago Mayor and will promptly move City Hall to Manny's Deli, where he will move in upstairs until he can get rid of his tenant.
• Christine O'Donnell will pay off her campaign debt by autographing witch hats at Halloween stores. She will also ask Meg Whitman for a few bucks after the latter blew $140 million of her own money on a losing campaign to the former and now present Governor Moonbeam who will surprise Californians by repealing "don't ask, don't tell" in Hollywood.
• Colin Firth will stunningly stammer through his Oscar acceptance speech thus proving that his performance in The King's Speech was digitally enhanced.
• Brett Favre will finally retire from the NFL and will begin a new career as a spokesperson for a line of feminine hygiene products.
• The Chicago Cubs will wind up in 6th place and be forced to sell Wrigley Field to make room for another CVS store.

It looks like 2011 could actually be worse! Let's hope TNB is wrong, which he rarely is.