- Politics-- Both Barack Obama and John McCain will announce their vice presidential nominees. The media will have a field day delving into every aspect of the two individuals' backgrounds, including interviews with childhood friends from 30 to 50 years ago, who will tell all about the candidate's first kiss, drug experimentation (if any), school behavior including copying on exams and other relevant matters which will greatly help the electorate in determining ultimate fitness for high office.
- Olympics-- After thousands of arrests of dissidents, interference with journalists access to the Internet and killer (literally) pollution affecting athletes and spectators, China will announce that the Games were the most successful in history, thus justifying the selection of their country as a worthy member of the civilized world. There will be no doping scandals, because no tests will work in the Chinese smog.
- Other Sports-- At least 3 NFL stars will sustain serious injury in meaningless exhibition games. Tiger Woods will get special dispensation to ride a cart so that he can win the PGA tournament (and help TV ratings). Two 20 year old female tennis stars will announce their retirement, citing burnout from playing or practicing every day since the age of 8. A dozen or more college football players will be arrested, although most will still play this season.
- Celebrities-- Not fewer than five breakups will be announced. Most will not result in divorces, since few of these people are actually married to their partners, although there are often children involved. The pending Hollywood actors' strike will be averted by the threat to use replacements who are out of work politicians, particularly those who did not make the vice presidential cut (see above).
Now you don't have to bother with the actual news, but can spend more time enjoying the summer, or perhaps writing your own blog.
6 comments:
TNB,
Those are all pretty safe predictions. I notice you didn't comment on the summer baseball races, which would have been calling upon your major predictive powers.
TNB has no wish to rattle the baseball Gods at this critical time.
OMG-you are so smart. I was wondering how we would all get along on your big trip--I should have known better---Hope both MR and Mrs TNB have a ball--Hi to your travel partners and I will be thinking of you all. SUZI
TNB didn't really go out on a limb with these predictions. I'd like more specificity, e.g., Who will be the veep nominees? Will Michael Phelps surpass Mark Spitz's Olympic record? Will McCain suffer a backlash due to his negative (and just plain bizarre) campaign ads..or will they hurt Obama?
Have fun in Europe, TNB and Mrs. TNB!
So will it be Biden or Bayh, Romney or Huckabee ? Will Brangalina become just Bran & Galina ? How will we get along with out our TNB fix? Don't they have internet access on your cruise or is it time for TNB to take a well deserved break.
Have a great time. Can't wait for the post vacation post.
Actually, I think the NFL stars and possibly some MLB stars will sustain injuries not due to pre-season games but due to punching their fellow teammates! I have to agree with your other readers that I was hoping for some prognosticating on the Veep candidates. I know you too well to assume you'd even mention the MLB standings - as you'll return to your blog before September 1st!
TTFN and Bon Voyage.
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