In case you hadn't heard, Oscar nominee Josh Brolin has been signed to play the lead in "Rod:The Movie" with Will Smith as Barack Obama and Ben Stiller as Rahm Emanuel. Although it is still possible that a soon to be unemployed Illinois Governor might want to play himself. He's certainly been too busy visiting "The View" to even attend his own impeachment trial, where contrary to his public pronouncements, he could certainly testify in his own behalf. But of course, he then couldn't play martyr or wrap himself in the mantra of Gandhi, Mandela and King. TNB just realized that chutzpah was a Serbian word.
Blago is just the latest in a series of governors who have fallen on hard times. Being a governor is not what it used to be, although there will never be any shortage of candidates anywhere in the USA.
As recently as 1977-2009, the White House (with the exception of Bush 41's one term) was continually occupied by former governors (Carter, Reagan, Clinton and Bush 43). But the 2008 Presidential campaign produced only a few viable candidates (Romney, Huckabee) who were former governors plus one sitting governor (Richardson) now being investigated for corruption and another (Sarah you-know-who)now being investigated for brain cramp. There don't appear to be a lot of present governors who are future presidential material, but as we know surprises happen.
Worse yet, this decade alone has seen the following governors lose their office under a cloud:
Convicted and Sent to Prison:
John Rowland (CT)
Edward Di Prete (RI)
Edwin Edwards (LA)
George Ryan (IL)
Recalled by Electorate:
Gray Davis (CA) Replaced by Arnold S.
Resigned Due to Sex Scandal:
James McGreevey NJ) Involving a male
Eliot Spitzer (NY) Involving a female
Spitzer's successor, David Paterson, has not exactly distinguished himself in selecting Hillary Clinton's Senate replacement, but he at least apparently didn't attempt to sell the seat to the highest bidder (Caroline could have easily been the winner).
Senators have fared a little better, although Ted Stevens was convicted of corruption and Larry Craig was a bad boy in the men's room.
Not a lot of great role models for today's youth.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
America the Beautiful
Even the ultimate cynic--TNB--has to confess that he too was excited, inspired and a little bit overwhelmed by the enormity of Inauguration Day. The sight of millions of Americans, black and white, in Washington or elsewhere, exulting in the new President and the hope he brings has to warm even the coldest, most skeptical of hearts. This scenario is what makes America Beautiful.
Even George W. Bush appeared to rise to the occasion by being gracious in transition and amazingly issuing no political pardons, even preemptive. Out of luck were Scooter Libby, George Ryan, Alberto Gonzalez et al. At least W. left office with a lot more dignity than did his predecessor, Bill Clinton, who started a long period of sleaziness with some of his questionable last minute pardons.
Speaking of Bill, leave it to Bush home state Senator John Cornyn to absurdly hold up Hillary Clinton's confirmation (by one day) by refusing to join in a unanimous voice vote (9 other nominees were so confirmed). This proves what exactly?? A little dose of reality apparently. The honeymoon will obviously end, but can we have at least a few months of civility while President Obama (sounds nice) tries to begin extricating America from the mess he's inherited?
Also, was TNB only imagining that Chief Justice Roberts, whose confirmation Senator Obama voted against, sort of deliberately flubbed the administration of the Presidential oath? There's that cynicism rearing up again.
Finally, the best description of the new President (never used for his predecessor) is "he's one cool dude". Come to think of it, that's no description of TNB either.
Even George W. Bush appeared to rise to the occasion by being gracious in transition and amazingly issuing no political pardons, even preemptive. Out of luck were Scooter Libby, George Ryan, Alberto Gonzalez et al. At least W. left office with a lot more dignity than did his predecessor, Bill Clinton, who started a long period of sleaziness with some of his questionable last minute pardons.
Speaking of Bill, leave it to Bush home state Senator John Cornyn to absurdly hold up Hillary Clinton's confirmation (by one day) by refusing to join in a unanimous voice vote (9 other nominees were so confirmed). This proves what exactly?? A little dose of reality apparently. The honeymoon will obviously end, but can we have at least a few months of civility while President Obama (sounds nice) tries to begin extricating America from the mess he's inherited?
Also, was TNB only imagining that Chief Justice Roberts, whose confirmation Senator Obama voted against, sort of deliberately flubbed the administration of the Presidential oath? There's that cynicism rearing up again.
Finally, the best description of the new President (never used for his predecessor) is "he's one cool dude". Come to think of it, that's no description of TNB either.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Scoundrels
Can anyone remember when the American public has been so captivated by the parallel but unrelated sagas of two fascinating scoundrels--Bernie Madoff and Rod Blagojevich?
Even TNB couldn't make this up.
To the dismay of his many direct and indirect victims, Bernie Madoff is under "house arrest" in his luxurious Manhattan penthouse, enjoying a lot better food, bedding and other comforts than he would if he had been remanded to a Federal pen while awaiting his ultimate fate. Since there is obviously a different standard of justice for some of the privileged (why should he qualify?)one wonders if such ultimate fate will satisfy the horde of revenge seekers. Many of these people would (at least surreptitously) prefer that Bernie took the honorable way out (fat chance) and flipped out his window, after of course alerting the New York Post. Certainly his Austrian banker friend Sonja Kohn, reputed to be in hiding from Russian "businessmen" whose billions she apparently "invested" with Bernie, would like to avoid showing her face by being forced to testify at his trial.
Isn't it interesting that when Americans are swindled they just file lawsuits but when Russians (and maybe others) are conned, they put out a hit on the perpetrator?
Just as incredible as Bernie is our embattled (impeached on a 114-1 vote, facing Federal criminal charges, etc.) Illinois governor Rod (the mad Serbian) Blagojevich.
Who else but Blago could go jogging while the impeachment vote was being taken and then hours later conclude a "press conference" (no questions allowed) by quoting Tennyson, two weeks after similarly quoting Kipling?
No doubt Rod is looking for some other English poets to quote during his upcoming Illinois Senate trial where, contrary to his lawyers' desires, he will probably testify. As a public service, TNB offers the following possibilities:
BROWNING "All's over then; does truth sound bitter as one at first believes"
SHELLEY "One word is too often profaned for me to profane it"
FLECKER "I had a friend who battled for the truth with stubborn heart and obstinate despair"
CONSTABLE "Give pardon, blessed soul, to my bold cries"
Even TNB couldn't make this up.
To the dismay of his many direct and indirect victims, Bernie Madoff is under "house arrest" in his luxurious Manhattan penthouse, enjoying a lot better food, bedding and other comforts than he would if he had been remanded to a Federal pen while awaiting his ultimate fate. Since there is obviously a different standard of justice for some of the privileged (why should he qualify?)one wonders if such ultimate fate will satisfy the horde of revenge seekers. Many of these people would (at least surreptitously) prefer that Bernie took the honorable way out (fat chance) and flipped out his window, after of course alerting the New York Post. Certainly his Austrian banker friend Sonja Kohn, reputed to be in hiding from Russian "businessmen" whose billions she apparently "invested" with Bernie, would like to avoid showing her face by being forced to testify at his trial.
Isn't it interesting that when Americans are swindled they just file lawsuits but when Russians (and maybe others) are conned, they put out a hit on the perpetrator?
Just as incredible as Bernie is our embattled (impeached on a 114-1 vote, facing Federal criminal charges, etc.) Illinois governor Rod (the mad Serbian) Blagojevich.
Who else but Blago could go jogging while the impeachment vote was being taken and then hours later conclude a "press conference" (no questions allowed) by quoting Tennyson, two weeks after similarly quoting Kipling?
No doubt Rod is looking for some other English poets to quote during his upcoming Illinois Senate trial where, contrary to his lawyers' desires, he will probably testify. As a public service, TNB offers the following possibilities:
BROWNING "All's over then; does truth sound bitter as one at first believes"
SHELLEY "One word is too often profaned for me to profane it"
FLECKER "I had a friend who battled for the truth with stubborn heart and obstinate despair"
CONSTABLE "Give pardon, blessed soul, to my bold cries"
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Pardon Me
With the daily rush of events (Gaza, Burris, Richardson, job losses, etc.) now occurring, it is difficult for Barack Obama to continue to function in the "one President at a time" mode. But for 13 more days, George W. Bush ("forgotten but not yet gone" in the apt words of Frank Rich) is still the President. The Dick Cheney coup feared by TNB hasn't happened. So it appears that W. will have a chance as did all his predecessors to issue a slew of pardons on the way out of office. Bill Clinton managed to have a few humdingers--especially Marc Rich, whose pardon may be a factor in the upcoming confirmation hearings for Eric Holder as attorney general.
The presumptive pardonees (is this a real word?)can be grouped in 3 main categories.
Keep this list handy (sort of like the Oscar nominees) so you can follow the last minute news just prior to the inauguration. Remember you don't have to be convicted or even indicted to be pardoned (see Gerald Ford pardon of Richard Nixon in 1974).
MORE LIKELY THAN NOT:
Ex White House Aide Scooter Libby (previously convicted but jail sentence commuted)
Ex Alaska Senator Ted Stevens (convicted but not yet sentenced)
Ex Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez (still facing Federal inquiries)
Ex Lobbyist/Fixer Jack Abramoff (in jail but not yet singing soprano)
MORE NOT THAN LIKELY:
Ex Enron CEO Jeff Skilling (serving time for accounting fraud)
Ex WorldCom CEO Bernard Ebbers (serving time for accounting fraud)
Ex Illinois Governor George Ryan (in jail at age 75)
NOT A CHANCE IN HELL:
Present Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich (apparently soon to be indicted)
Super Swindler Bernard Madoff (apparently soon to be indicted)
Watch for a few surprises as the lame duck utters his final quacks.
The presumptive pardonees (is this a real word?)can be grouped in 3 main categories.
Keep this list handy (sort of like the Oscar nominees) so you can follow the last minute news just prior to the inauguration. Remember you don't have to be convicted or even indicted to be pardoned (see Gerald Ford pardon of Richard Nixon in 1974).
MORE LIKELY THAN NOT:
Ex White House Aide Scooter Libby (previously convicted but jail sentence commuted)
Ex Alaska Senator Ted Stevens (convicted but not yet sentenced)
Ex Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez (still facing Federal inquiries)
Ex Lobbyist/Fixer Jack Abramoff (in jail but not yet singing soprano)
MORE NOT THAN LIKELY:
Ex Enron CEO Jeff Skilling (serving time for accounting fraud)
Ex WorldCom CEO Bernard Ebbers (serving time for accounting fraud)
Ex Illinois Governor George Ryan (in jail at age 75)
NOT A CHANCE IN HELL:
Present Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich (apparently soon to be indicted)
Super Swindler Bernard Madoff (apparently soon to be indicted)
Watch for a few surprises as the lame duck utters his final quacks.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
What 2009 Will Bring
After the incredible year we've all experienced in 2008, it's not surprising that most everyone is looking towards 2009 with apprehension. But not TNB. He will tell you what 2009 will bring--and just possibly at least one prediction will prove correct (a lucky guess, no doubt). So here goes:
1. After a few months of dealing with the Israeli/Palestinian confict, unemployment, the disastrous housing market and Vladimir Putin, Barack Obama will rescind his no smoking pledge and pose shirtless for a Marlboro Light ad.
2. Clarence Thomas will resign from the Supreme Court, thus allowing Barack Obama to pick a liberal African-American from Illinois for that seat. His choice will be either Senator-to-be Roland Burris or former Chicago attorney Michelle Obama.
3. Kate Winslet, after receiving her 6th Oscar nomination (for Revolutionary Road) will finally be named Best Actress and will stun the live (and TV) audience by doing what she has done in many of her films--take off her clothes.
4. While his wife is in Pakistan negotiating with Osama Bin Laden for his surrender (and a book deal) Bill Clinton will be caught on a date with Sarah Palin, the world's coolest grandmother.
5. Sarah's daughter Bristol will turn down the $300,000 she's been offered for pictures of her adorable love child and hire agent Ari Gold from Entourage to represent her. The negotiations will have to wait until Jeremy Piven, who portrays Ari, is released from sushi rehab.
6. Oprah Winfrey will announce the immediate end of her talk show, stating that she's been duped by a lying author one too many times to maintain her self respect. No, Bernard Madoff did not write a book--that was his wife Ruth. Although she's an African-American from Illinois, Oprah will not be considered for the aforementiond Supreme Court vacancy.
7. Rod Blagojevich will surprise everyone by taking off his toupee at his trial, thus throwing the jury into a frenzy.
8. The Chicago Cubs will win the World Series, thus shocking their new owners--the US Treasury.
1. After a few months of dealing with the Israeli/Palestinian confict, unemployment, the disastrous housing market and Vladimir Putin, Barack Obama will rescind his no smoking pledge and pose shirtless for a Marlboro Light ad.
2. Clarence Thomas will resign from the Supreme Court, thus allowing Barack Obama to pick a liberal African-American from Illinois for that seat. His choice will be either Senator-to-be Roland Burris or former Chicago attorney Michelle Obama.
3. Kate Winslet, after receiving her 6th Oscar nomination (for Revolutionary Road) will finally be named Best Actress and will stun the live (and TV) audience by doing what she has done in many of her films--take off her clothes.
4. While his wife is in Pakistan negotiating with Osama Bin Laden for his surrender (and a book deal) Bill Clinton will be caught on a date with Sarah Palin, the world's coolest grandmother.
5. Sarah's daughter Bristol will turn down the $300,000 she's been offered for pictures of her adorable love child and hire agent Ari Gold from Entourage to represent her. The negotiations will have to wait until Jeremy Piven, who portrays Ari, is released from sushi rehab.
6. Oprah Winfrey will announce the immediate end of her talk show, stating that she's been duped by a lying author one too many times to maintain her self respect. No, Bernard Madoff did not write a book--that was his wife Ruth. Although she's an African-American from Illinois, Oprah will not be considered for the aforementiond Supreme Court vacancy.
7. Rod Blagojevich will surprise everyone by taking off his toupee at his trial, thus throwing the jury into a frenzy.
8. The Chicago Cubs will win the World Series, thus shocking their new owners--the US Treasury.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Can You Believe This
As a young auditor almost a half century ago (!) TNB learned and tried to consistently follow 2 significant rules, which apply not only to his profession but also to the broader business world and life in general:
1. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably isn't
2. Trust, but verify
Perhaps this is why TNB personally and The Normal Blog in particular exhibits a decidedly skeptical, some might say cynical viewpoint. If instead of allowing greed and arrogance to overwhelm common sense, more people were more skeptical and didn't believe everything pitched to them, maybe we wouldn't be reeling from frauds large and small. What to believe? Just check out the following items--hard to tell what is totally true, what might have occurred and what is a stretch of TNB's bizarre imagination:
A. Bernie Madoff's wife, a renowned dietician and author, has a new volume out called "Cooking the Books", including some tasty recipes guaranteed to slim you down (at least your bank account).
B. After apparently making many rich Jews and Jewish charities a lot poorer (or in some cases totally bankrupt) Bernie Madoff broadened his reach, as an equal opportunity swindler, to many foreign investors. An Abu Dhabi hedge fund lost $400 million, thus causing further harm to Israeli-Arab peace prospects. BTW--see above re: "too good to be true", "trust & verify".
C. After disgustingly sneezing into a tissue on Jay Leno's program and then auctioning the tissue on E-Bay for $3,000 (proceeds to charity), actress Scarlet Johannson announced that she will also auction for charity some of her used feminine hygiene products.
D. The shotgun wedding of the decade was indefinitely postponed when Bristol Palin's prospective mother in law was arrested on felony drug charges (Wasilla, Alaska is a known meth center).
E. Quoting liberally from Rudyard Kipling's famous poem "If", Rod Blagojevich surprised most Illinoisans with his sensitive, cultured side.
F. Actor Jeremy Piven ("Entourage")suddenly quit the 3 person Broadway cast of "Speed the Plow" claiming that eating too mush sushi caused greatly elevated levels of mercury. TNB had seen his performance, which incredibly contained more expletives than uttered by Patti Blagojevich when talking about the Cubs and Tribune on the famous wiretaps. "Speed the Plow" playwright David Mamet, a noted softie, exclaimed "I guess Piven's given up show business to become a thermometer" (this is actually true--even TNB couldn't make it up).
G. George W. Bush is seriously considering pardoning imprisoned former governor George Ryan, since he was informed by Federal prison officials that their facilities can only handle one Illinois governor at a time.
1. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably isn't
2. Trust, but verify
Perhaps this is why TNB personally and The Normal Blog in particular exhibits a decidedly skeptical, some might say cynical viewpoint. If instead of allowing greed and arrogance to overwhelm common sense, more people were more skeptical and didn't believe everything pitched to them, maybe we wouldn't be reeling from frauds large and small. What to believe? Just check out the following items--hard to tell what is totally true, what might have occurred and what is a stretch of TNB's bizarre imagination:
A. Bernie Madoff's wife, a renowned dietician and author, has a new volume out called "Cooking the Books", including some tasty recipes guaranteed to slim you down (at least your bank account).
B. After apparently making many rich Jews and Jewish charities a lot poorer (or in some cases totally bankrupt) Bernie Madoff broadened his reach, as an equal opportunity swindler, to many foreign investors. An Abu Dhabi hedge fund lost $400 million, thus causing further harm to Israeli-Arab peace prospects. BTW--see above re: "too good to be true", "trust & verify".
C. After disgustingly sneezing into a tissue on Jay Leno's program and then auctioning the tissue on E-Bay for $3,000 (proceeds to charity), actress Scarlet Johannson announced that she will also auction for charity some of her used feminine hygiene products.
D. The shotgun wedding of the decade was indefinitely postponed when Bristol Palin's prospective mother in law was arrested on felony drug charges (Wasilla, Alaska is a known meth center).
E. Quoting liberally from Rudyard Kipling's famous poem "If", Rod Blagojevich surprised most Illinoisans with his sensitive, cultured side.
F. Actor Jeremy Piven ("Entourage")suddenly quit the 3 person Broadway cast of "Speed the Plow" claiming that eating too mush sushi caused greatly elevated levels of mercury. TNB had seen his performance, which incredibly contained more expletives than uttered by Patti Blagojevich when talking about the Cubs and Tribune on the famous wiretaps. "Speed the Plow" playwright David Mamet, a noted softie, exclaimed "I guess Piven's given up show business to become a thermometer" (this is actually true--even TNB couldn't make it up).
G. George W. Bush is seriously considering pardoning imprisoned former governor George Ryan, since he was informed by Federal prison officials that their facilities can only handle one Illinois governor at a time.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Awards Season
As another year end quickly approaches, the inevitable lists of the best of this (and also the worst of that) are appearing on TV, in the newspapers and on the Internet. BTW, early "buzz" for a Best Actor Oscar nomination is for Mickey Rourke (remember him?)in The Wrestler. But generally the winners are pretty predictable. So TNB, in an effort to change the dynamic, hereby announces the first annual AB awards (for AB-NORMAL of course). Following are the categories and nominees. Any reader of The Normal Blog is eligible to vote, even multiple times (after all, you know where TNB is from). Send in your E-Mails or post a comment. Results will be announced in early January 2009 (while W. is still President).
DUMBEST GOVERNOR:
Rod Blagojevich
Sarah Palin
Eliot Spitzer
DUMBEST SENATOR:
Larry Craig
Ted Stevens
Anyone Accepting Appointment to Vacant Illinois Seat
DUMBEST PRESIDENT:
George W. Bush
George W. Bush
George W. Bush
JEWS ARE PROUDEST OF:
Albert Einstein
Sandy Koufax
Barbra Streisand
JEWS ARE MOST ASHAMED OF:
Political Fixer Jack Abramoff
Mobster Meyer Lansky
Alleged $50 Billion Swindler Bernard Madoff (pronounced "made off" as with
all your money --OY)
JEWS BELIEVE HE IS ONE OF THEM BUT HE'S NOT:
Treasury Secretary Designate Tim Geithner
Actor Sean Penn
Barack Obama
WORST JOE:
Joe the Plumber
Joe (Benedict Arnold) Lieberman
Cup of Coffee at Truck Stop
WORST SPORTS FLOP:
Chicago Cubs (playoffs)
New York Yankees (regular season)
Big Brown (last in Belmont after winning 1st 2 legs of horse racing Triple
Crown)
MOST ERUDITE AND SOPHISTICATED POLITICAL BLOG:
Huffington Post
The Swamp
The Normal Blog
DUMBEST GOVERNOR:
Rod Blagojevich
Sarah Palin
Eliot Spitzer
DUMBEST SENATOR:
Larry Craig
Ted Stevens
Anyone Accepting Appointment to Vacant Illinois Seat
DUMBEST PRESIDENT:
George W. Bush
George W. Bush
George W. Bush
JEWS ARE PROUDEST OF:
Albert Einstein
Sandy Koufax
Barbra Streisand
JEWS ARE MOST ASHAMED OF:
Political Fixer Jack Abramoff
Mobster Meyer Lansky
Alleged $50 Billion Swindler Bernard Madoff (pronounced "made off" as with
all your money --OY)
JEWS BELIEVE HE IS ONE OF THEM BUT HE'S NOT:
Treasury Secretary Designate Tim Geithner
Actor Sean Penn
Barack Obama
WORST JOE:
Joe the Plumber
Joe (Benedict Arnold) Lieberman
Cup of Coffee at Truck Stop
WORST SPORTS FLOP:
Chicago Cubs (playoffs)
New York Yankees (regular season)
Big Brown (last in Belmont after winning 1st 2 legs of horse racing Triple
Crown)
MOST ERUDITE AND SOPHISTICATED POLITICAL BLOG:
Huffington Post
The Swamp
The Normal Blog
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
