- Wayne LaPierre The executive VP of the NRA reached, even for him and his despicable group, a new low with his prescription for school safety-- a gun in every classroom. Is there anyone who doesn't realize that, unlike other organizations that legitimately try to protect gun rights, the NRA is just a tool of the gun and ammunition manufacturers? Cut the sanctimonious crap, Wayne, and own up to it--you're merely a front man trying to sell more guns. The current debate has NOTHING to do with the Second Amendment, which is not under attack. It's all about Profits. It's very telling that this week the hedge fund Cerberus Management, headed by publicity shy Steven Feinberg, announced they were putting all of their numerous gun companies up for sale. Apparently, the blood of schoolchildren indirectly tied to them suddenly produced a conscience. Maybe Wayne will find one--unlikely, when you're as big a jerk as he is, there's really no hope.
- Donald Trump Speaking of reaching new lows, how about the Donald with his phony late October "offer" to the President pledging $5 million to a charity of Obama's choice if he would reveal his college transcripts and passport applications (Romney didn't receive the same offer). After getting the requisite dose of publicity (mostly negative) weren't you surprised that Trump didn't use that "spare" $5 million for relief in his own backyard for Hurricane Sandy victims? TNB can now reveal that this bizarre behavior results from the nest of aliens lodged in Trump's hairdo.
- Todd Akin, Richard Mourdock, Joe Walsh These are only the best known politicians to shoot themseves in the foot (or if you prefer, another appendage) by shockingly uninformed remarks about abortion and the female body. In the future, in order to secure the GOP nomination for any office, perhaps all male candidates ought to complete a basic course in female anatomy . Or at least have an IQ in three digits.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Jerks of the Year
As usual, Time Magazine has just announced its Person of the Year--no big surprise, it's President Obama. But after searching high and low, TNB could not find any publication (respectable or otherwise) who has had the courage (or bad taste) to name its jerk of the year. There are actually so many worthy candidates, multiple "winners" are required. So in no particular order:
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Happy Birthday TNB
TNB wants to thank the American electorate for making his upcoming birthday a happy one (No ages please--but suffice to say there are two "lucky" numbers involved).
Some Observations
FLORIDA
Votes still not fully counted in Miami-Dade county? Again? If TNB didn't know better, he'd swear that the number of Cental American, South American and Cuban exiles there have turned this into a sort of banana republic. Next election they'll need international observers!
THE DONALD
Not satisfied with his pitiful, publicity-seeking, patently phony charity offers (how much did he give to Sandy relief?) Trump now says there should be a march on Washington to protest the election! Is he suggesting a coup like in, say, a banana republic [see above]?
ABORTION
Obviously Karl Rove and his ilk didn't get the message. Women want control over their own reproductive rights and every time some neanderthal male right-winger speaks stupidly about rape and abortion, they're going to lose [see: Todd Akin, Richard Mourdock and Joe Walsh]. Talk about shooting yourself in the foot--or some other appendage.
LATINOS
When a basically centrist Republican like Mitt Romney has to pretend he's "severely conservative" (his words) to secure the GOP nomination he's bound to make statements that will eventually haunt him such as "illegal immigrants should self-deport". And then of course the majority of Republicans are (or were) in denial over the demographic changes that have made Latinos the fast-growing voting bloc.
2016
TNB is fascinated by the fact that not since 1928 has a Republican Presidential ticket been successful without a Nixon or Bush on the ticket running for President or Vice President. Does this mean Jeb Bush will be their next nominee? He should at least know what's happening in South Florida [see above]. Or is that sort of ominous?
SHELDON ADELSON
Here's hoping that Sheldon who blew over $10 million (chump change in one of his casinos) in a misguided effort to help Israel (they are just fine with Obama!) is happy today. For TNB's money (not $10 million) Sheldon ranks as the most despicable Jew since Bernie Madoff.
OPRAH
The undisputed most important woman in Chicago for 25 years (remember her in Grant Park in 2008 on election night?) has vanished from sight here. Did she even support Obama? Who cares really?
After the dust clears, the next four years will be just as tough as the last four. TNB is not optimistic about bipartisanship, civility, etc. (in fairness Mitt's concession speech was gracious). But he'll celebrate on his birthday nevertheless. No gifts please.
Some Observations
FLORIDA
Votes still not fully counted in Miami-Dade county? Again? If TNB didn't know better, he'd swear that the number of Cental American, South American and Cuban exiles there have turned this into a sort of banana republic. Next election they'll need international observers!
THE DONALD
Not satisfied with his pitiful, publicity-seeking, patently phony charity offers (how much did he give to Sandy relief?) Trump now says there should be a march on Washington to protest the election! Is he suggesting a coup like in, say, a banana republic [see above]?
ABORTION
Obviously Karl Rove and his ilk didn't get the message. Women want control over their own reproductive rights and every time some neanderthal male right-winger speaks stupidly about rape and abortion, they're going to lose [see: Todd Akin, Richard Mourdock and Joe Walsh]. Talk about shooting yourself in the foot--or some other appendage.
LATINOS
When a basically centrist Republican like Mitt Romney has to pretend he's "severely conservative" (his words) to secure the GOP nomination he's bound to make statements that will eventually haunt him such as "illegal immigrants should self-deport". And then of course the majority of Republicans are (or were) in denial over the demographic changes that have made Latinos the fast-growing voting bloc.
2016
TNB is fascinated by the fact that not since 1928 has a Republican Presidential ticket been successful without a Nixon or Bush on the ticket running for President or Vice President. Does this mean Jeb Bush will be their next nominee? He should at least know what's happening in South Florida [see above]. Or is that sort of ominous?
SHELDON ADELSON
Here's hoping that Sheldon who blew over $10 million (chump change in one of his casinos) in a misguided effort to help Israel (they are just fine with Obama!) is happy today. For TNB's money (not $10 million) Sheldon ranks as the most despicable Jew since Bernie Madoff.
OPRAH
The undisputed most important woman in Chicago for 25 years (remember her in Grant Park in 2008 on election night?) has vanished from sight here. Did she even support Obama? Who cares really?
After the dust clears, the next four years will be just as tough as the last four. TNB is not optimistic about bipartisanship, civility, etc. (in fairness Mitt's concession speech was gracious). But he'll celebrate on his birthday nevertheless. No gifts please.
Friday, October 19, 2012
Are We There Yet
For as far back as we all can remember, a common question from children, bored and impatient while on what seemed to them like an interminable car trip was "Are we there yet?" Currently, a TV commercial (for Mercedes automobiles) leverages on this query.
But forget the car trips. TNB's plaintive question concerning the election is "Are we there yet?" and if not, what's the delay?
Does it only seem like ever since the midterm elections, 23 months ago, the Presidential race has been in full swing? Honestly, do we need another debate, 18 more days of spin from both sides, tens of millions of dollars spent (in only 8 or 9 "swing" states--Illinois, New York, California, Texas and others are alas losing out), dozens of E-mails, robocalls, etc. to persuade "undecided voters", assuming there are such creatures existing who might actually go to the polls on November 6th.
Haven't we heard enough ad nauseum about the economy, jobs, taxes, Libya, women's rights (why should this even be an issue in 2012?) etc. Strangely, what TNB hasn't heard enough of is the potential and likely effect of this election on the makeup of the Supreme Court and whether abortion gets relegated to the back alleys and whether hard won gay rights get trampled.
The presidential terms of 4 years are beginning to resemble the congressional terms of 2 years--half the term is spent running for reelection or at least raising money. Governing? Somewhat of an afterthought.
TNB himself is also asking the question "Will getting there be worth it?"Kind of scary.
But forget the car trips. TNB's plaintive question concerning the election is "Are we there yet?" and if not, what's the delay?
Does it only seem like ever since the midterm elections, 23 months ago, the Presidential race has been in full swing? Honestly, do we need another debate, 18 more days of spin from both sides, tens of millions of dollars spent (in only 8 or 9 "swing" states--Illinois, New York, California, Texas and others are alas losing out), dozens of E-mails, robocalls, etc. to persuade "undecided voters", assuming there are such creatures existing who might actually go to the polls on November 6th.
Haven't we heard enough ad nauseum about the economy, jobs, taxes, Libya, women's rights (why should this even be an issue in 2012?) etc. Strangely, what TNB hasn't heard enough of is the potential and likely effect of this election on the makeup of the Supreme Court and whether abortion gets relegated to the back alleys and whether hard won gay rights get trampled.
The presidential terms of 4 years are beginning to resemble the congressional terms of 2 years--half the term is spent running for reelection or at least raising money. Governing? Somewhat of an afterthought.
TNB himself is also asking the question "Will getting there be worth it?"Kind of scary.
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Low Expectations
Going back 150 years or so to Charles Dickens, the term Great Expectations had significance. Why not have expectations of success in life that were great or at least pretty good?
But of course Dickens was writing before the modern presidential campaign. On the eve of the first debate between President Obama and Mitt Romney we have generally been treated to a plethora of low expectations, with each camp's surrogates pooh-poohing their candidates debating abilities while complimenting the other (an exception has been Chris Christie who may have his own 2016 agenda).
The obvious reason for such ludicrous and even dishonest pronouncements--if the respective candidates don't trip on their shoelaces (or tongues) and don't emit any strange noises their side can (and you can bet will) claim victory. The low expectations will have been exceeded--how could they not?
So who falls for this nonsense? There are just so many truly undecided voters and they apparently don't really matter if they're not from one of the 7 or 8 swing states. At this point, you might be asking yourself why bother with the debates at all? In addition to making for riveting live television, there's always the chance for a major slipup--Richard Nixon with his five o'clock shadow, Michael Dukakis fumbling a question on his response if his wife had been raped and murdered. [Talk about low--questions concerning a candidate's fitness to be President shouldn't have to sink to that level].
Wouldn't it be a bit unusual if say product advertising dealt in low rather than high expectations? Imagine an ad for an automobile that promises minimum efficiency, mediocre gas mileage and has homely rather than handsome people portrayed as buyers? Would you buy that car with such extremely low expectations? Or would you "ask your doctor" about some rather frightening new medicine that only promises to possibly help you? Nowhere else but in presidential debates are low expectations so attractive.
TNB will watch anyway. His expectation--nothing much will change.
But of course Dickens was writing before the modern presidential campaign. On the eve of the first debate between President Obama and Mitt Romney we have generally been treated to a plethora of low expectations, with each camp's surrogates pooh-poohing their candidates debating abilities while complimenting the other (an exception has been Chris Christie who may have his own 2016 agenda).
The obvious reason for such ludicrous and even dishonest pronouncements--if the respective candidates don't trip on their shoelaces (or tongues) and don't emit any strange noises their side can (and you can bet will) claim victory. The low expectations will have been exceeded--how could they not?
So who falls for this nonsense? There are just so many truly undecided voters and they apparently don't really matter if they're not from one of the 7 or 8 swing states. At this point, you might be asking yourself why bother with the debates at all? In addition to making for riveting live television, there's always the chance for a major slipup--Richard Nixon with his five o'clock shadow, Michael Dukakis fumbling a question on his response if his wife had been raped and murdered. [Talk about low--questions concerning a candidate's fitness to be President shouldn't have to sink to that level].
Wouldn't it be a bit unusual if say product advertising dealt in low rather than high expectations? Imagine an ad for an automobile that promises minimum efficiency, mediocre gas mileage and has homely rather than handsome people portrayed as buyers? Would you buy that car with such extremely low expectations? Or would you "ask your doctor" about some rather frightening new medicine that only promises to possibly help you? Nowhere else but in presidential debates are low expectations so attractive.
TNB will watch anyway. His expectation--nothing much will change.
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Know When to Fold 'Em
Remember Kenny Rogers' famous song "The Gambler"? The classic line was "You gotta know when to hold 'em and know when to fold 'em" referring of course to a poker hand. TNB recalled the line this week as a result of the bizarre performance by Hollywood icon Clint Eastwood at the Republican National Convention when to the dismay of the convention producers (and the candidates) old Dirty Harry had an imaginary conversation with an empty chair supposedly representing President Obama. This invisible Obama "conveyed" a message for Clint to relay to Mitt Romney to "go .... himself " [an anatomical impossibility].
Thus, another beloved personality has obviously overstayed his welcome in the spotlight, because he
didn't "know when to fold 'em" i.e, gracefully step back before diminishing and humiliating himself.
Think in sports Willie Mays, Muhammad Ali and even recently Brett Favre, among others, all of whom are unfortunately remembered not only for their massive accomplishments but alas for hanging on way past their primes, not only for ego reasons but certainly for financial rewards. And in the entertainment world how many embarrassing "farewell tours" have there been where the performer was way over the hill, one example being Frank Sinatra, probably (for most of his career) the greatest pop singer of all time.
After all the great movies, as an actor and director, that have starred Clint Eastwood, will this 12 minute long disgrace be his lasting legacy? Interesting that Clint has a new movie "Trouble with the Curve" coming out soon (was this maybe a promo??). Will the public shun him as they have an even badder boy, Mel Gibson? Or are there enough people who, like the delegates who applauded him wildly, believe this crap because it was uttered by a "celebrity"?
After all, these were the same people who lapped up a pack of lies so blatant that even Fox News blanched at some of the falsehoods, especially Paul Ryan's. Clint fit right in.
Thus, another beloved personality has obviously overstayed his welcome in the spotlight, because he
didn't "know when to fold 'em" i.e, gracefully step back before diminishing and humiliating himself.
Think in sports Willie Mays, Muhammad Ali and even recently Brett Favre, among others, all of whom are unfortunately remembered not only for their massive accomplishments but alas for hanging on way past their primes, not only for ego reasons but certainly for financial rewards. And in the entertainment world how many embarrassing "farewell tours" have there been where the performer was way over the hill, one example being Frank Sinatra, probably (for most of his career) the greatest pop singer of all time.
After all the great movies, as an actor and director, that have starred Clint Eastwood, will this 12 minute long disgrace be his lasting legacy? Interesting that Clint has a new movie "Trouble with the Curve" coming out soon (was this maybe a promo??). Will the public shun him as they have an even badder boy, Mel Gibson? Or are there enough people who, like the delegates who applauded him wildly, believe this crap because it was uttered by a "celebrity"?
After all, these were the same people who lapped up a pack of lies so blatant that even Fox News blanched at some of the falsehoods, especially Paul Ryan's. Clint fit right in.
Monday, August 20, 2012
Idiot's Delight
After a month or more of summer doldrums, the political season has really picked up. First there was Mitt Romney's selection of Paul Ryan as his running mate thus doubling the number of boring white guys on the GOP ticket. Ryan is a perfect fit because like Romney he only cares about making the rich richer. Anyone who believes their spiel about how they're better for the middle class is, sorry to say, an idiot.
Then we had the fascinating revelation that in August 2011 a large group of freshman GOP congressmen who were in Israel on a euphemistically named "fact-finding mission" paid for by the American-Israel Public Affairs Committee (AIPAC) went swimming in the Sea of Galilee while either clothed or in the case of Rep. Kevin Yoder of Kansas stark naked. Of course the Sea of Galilee is a holy site to Christians because it is the alleged site where Jesus walked on water. No word on whether any of these idiots attempted that feat. Anyway, the next morning, House majority leader Eric Cantor (probably the only Jew among the congressmen) who had not gone swimming purportedly severely reprimanded the group for, well, behaving like idiots. He probably told them to stay away from any mikvas.
Then in Illinois we have one of the top idiots--freshman Republican Joe Walsh who has been making increasingly stupid statements for two years. The latest was his dismissing his opponent , Tammy Duckworth, as a false hero although she lost both legs in a military helicopter incident while she was serving in Iraq (Walsh of course has no military experience).
But the top of the idiocy chart was reached over the weekend by Rep. Todd Akin, the Republican candidate for Senate in Missouri. He told a TV interviewer that women who are victims of what he termed "legitimate rape"(!!!!) have biological ways to "shut the whole thing down" or avoid pregnancy. Thus in his idiotic brain, there is no need to permit abortions in case of rape. Of course, when the inevitable fallout occurred, Akin's damage control spin included the classic "I misspoke". With national Republicans pressuring him to drop out (he has until tomorrow afternoon) watch for him to decide that he needs to spend more time with his family. As President Obama pointedly stated, male politicians (read: Republicans) should not be making health care decisions (birth control, abortion) for women. For that matter, why would any women who are not idiots vote Republican?
OMG-- we still have the Republican convention next week. TNB will be back soon.
Then we had the fascinating revelation that in August 2011 a large group of freshman GOP congressmen who were in Israel on a euphemistically named "fact-finding mission" paid for by the American-Israel Public Affairs Committee (AIPAC) went swimming in the Sea of Galilee while either clothed or in the case of Rep. Kevin Yoder of Kansas stark naked. Of course the Sea of Galilee is a holy site to Christians because it is the alleged site where Jesus walked on water. No word on whether any of these idiots attempted that feat. Anyway, the next morning, House majority leader Eric Cantor (probably the only Jew among the congressmen) who had not gone swimming purportedly severely reprimanded the group for, well, behaving like idiots. He probably told them to stay away from any mikvas.
Then in Illinois we have one of the top idiots--freshman Republican Joe Walsh who has been making increasingly stupid statements for two years. The latest was his dismissing his opponent , Tammy Duckworth, as a false hero although she lost both legs in a military helicopter incident while she was serving in Iraq (Walsh of course has no military experience).
But the top of the idiocy chart was reached over the weekend by Rep. Todd Akin, the Republican candidate for Senate in Missouri. He told a TV interviewer that women who are victims of what he termed "legitimate rape"(!!!!) have biological ways to "shut the whole thing down" or avoid pregnancy. Thus in his idiotic brain, there is no need to permit abortions in case of rape. Of course, when the inevitable fallout occurred, Akin's damage control spin included the classic "I misspoke". With national Republicans pressuring him to drop out (he has until tomorrow afternoon) watch for him to decide that he needs to spend more time with his family. As President Obama pointedly stated, male politicians (read: Republicans) should not be making health care decisions (birth control, abortion) for women. For that matter, why would any women who are not idiots vote Republican?
OMG-- we still have the Republican convention next week. TNB will be back soon.
Monday, July 23, 2012
Summer Headlines
Where to Turn First?
- BATMAN BECOMES REAL Dressed up in his faux Batman or monster gear and armed to the teeth James Holmes was quite the macho dude while shooting 70 people in of all sacred places (to TNB) a movie theater! [See the inspiration for this blog, the Normal Theater]. But in court today he didn't look very imposing, with his weird dyed hair, glassy stare, etc. Possibly over the weekend, the almost certain death penalty he will receive may have begun to register in his warped brain. BTW-- the futile argument over gun control (see the NRA) just surfaced again. When at least one right-wing gun nut Congressman suggested that if "law-abiding citizens" carrying weapons were only present in the theater, the carnage would have been stopped, TNB wanted to scream.Imagine after tear gas had been sprayed in a darkened theater and several "law-abiding citizens" had all started shooting at once, what the death toll would have amounted to!
- PENN STATE PUNISHED Speaking, sadly, of death penalties the university escaped having its football program shut down, which in the short run would financially penalize opponents whose games would be cancelled (not to mention anger the TV networks and their sponsors). While a $60 million fine will have to be paid over the next five years and bowl revenue and scholarships were severely curtailed, the biggest penalty occurred posthumously (sort of a post-death penalty) against the reputation and record of the late Joe Paterno. Joe Pa is now 8th instead of first on the all-time wins list, with all Penn State victories over the last 13 years retroactively wiped out. This action also in TNB's opinion unfairly penalizes all the players during that period. Couldn't Paterno's now removed statue just have been melted down instead? However, if it's OK (?) for Mitt Romney to retroactively retire from Bain Capital, apparently just about any actions or outcomes can be reversed--and many years later at that.
- MORE FINANCIAL SCANDALS The auditor in TNB never ceases to be amazed at the never-ending financial scandals. Let's see--there's the Barclay's LIBOR rate cheating, the HSBC terrorist money laundering, the $53 million apparently stolen by the controller of tiny Dixon, Illinos, Ronald Reagan's hometown, the apparent $200 million embezzlement by its CEO from Peregrine Financial (confessed to in a note left with a failed suicide attempt--this guy couldn't do anything right!) etc. etc. Interesting that about 10 years ago at the height of the Enron/World Com scandals, TNB predicted to his students in an auditing class he was then teaching at DePaul University that no matter what new controls were put in, these scandals would continue unabated (this was 6 years before the uncovering of Bernie Madoff). Easy to predict--human nature being what is is. Alas, not many of the students were paying close attention.
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