Who Can You Believe

Many years ago (when TNB was a youth) people generally believed in institutions such as schools, churches and synagogues, banks, the government and so on. Also, perhaps naively, most of us believed in doctors, lawyers, teachers, clergymen, bankers and public officials. How times have changed! Although of course there still are believable individuals and entities, we have all become so skeptical and cynical that it is fair to ask "Who Can You Believe?"

For example, just about no one today believes or admires politicians. If they are not lying about their background (see Connecticut Atty. Gen. Richard Blumenthal's fake Vietnam service record), they are hypocritically trumpeting their non-existent "family values" (see South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford, Indiana Rep. Mark Souder, etc. etc.). And then there's former Illinois Gov. Rod ("the Hair") Blagojevich who can't be believed about anything, although it remains to be seen just how gullible his soon-to-be-selected jurors are.

Our religious institutions don't have the same aura they once did, at least partially because all too many in the clergy have been exposed as all too human. Incredibly, some teachers have shown that they can't be trusted with children. And although it was always a good idea to "trust but verify" when entering into business transactions, in recent years it has almost been impossible (or impossibly stupid) to trust anyone (see Bernard Madoff, Goldman Sachs, Toyota, BP et al) when investing your life savings or just buying a car or assuming that large corporations won't ruin the environment.

In this atmosphere what can one do to retain some belief in the world around us? Probably the best solution is to get immersed in make believe (commercials, reality shows, Sarah Palin). They're just as believable as anything else and perhaps a little more amusing.

And then--if all else fails, you can believe in TNB. Never lied to you!

Reality Check

A reality check usually describes an occasion or event in which one is reminded of the state of things in the real world as contrasted to what exists in one's mind (often purposely or sincerely confused). TNB hereby offers to become head of the "reality check" police, or sort of a reality nanny. If such a position were in operation, there would be prompt daily accountability for all instances in which reality has been suspended. Some examples of the need for immediate reality checks follow:

• The apprehension of the alleged Times Square bomber turned up a naturalized American citizen who recently visited his Pakistani homeland and spent 5 months at a Taliban camp. Since he already had an MBA in the U.S. it is doubtful that he was there for additional finance classes. Despite all the apparent hard evidence against him (and his confession), a relative back home was quoted as claiming the arrest was part of an American "conspiracy" to justify bombings of the Taliban strongholds. It's obviously time for a major reality check. We know what you're up to over there and all the BS you can spew can't obliterate the facts.
• A University of Virginia lacrosse player was arrested for killing his 22 year old ex-girlfriend (a star of the women's lacrosse team ) by continually shaking her and pounding her head against the wall until she was dead (after breaking down her apartment door). In an egregious example of the need for a reality check (or at least a closed mouth) his attorney stated that this was just a "tragic accident". Really? Everyone's entitled to adequate representation, but must that consist of farfetched scenarios? Save it for the courtroom!
• In Chicago recently, 2 young women were viciously attacked with a baseball bat and robbed (one is still critical). A man and woman were arrested after brilliantly using the victims' credit and ATM cards. The alleged bat wielder has been denied bond while his female accomplice (who drove the car and rifled the 2 purses) is sitting in jail on $1,000,000 bond. The father of this 25 year old miscreant gave an interview in which he stated that she shouldn't be incarcerated because she didn't take her meds that day (?) and she is the mother of 2 small children, the father of whom is not the alleged perpetrator with whom she was out drinking until 3 AM. Here's the reality check, mister-- your daughter's a piece of garbage and can we please stop blaming "not taking meds" for every bad thing that happens. Do we need a law that requires everyone to take their meds (how could we monitor)?

Reality is not always pleasant--a lot easier to wallow in fantasy.

Mea Culpa

Mea Culpa of course is Latin for "my fault". Today's popular usage is the ubiquitous "my bad". It's very interesting that many recent declarations by individuals sort of explaining their role(s) in the financial crisis really weren't what many wanted--full mea culpas but instead were rather lame statements such as "I'm sorry" or "I regret" (just short of "tough luck"). This is naturally symptomatic of society as a whole--half-hearted apologies but no taking of responsiblity, which of course could lead to lawsuits or other nasty results, including loss of reputation (if any remains).

To TNB, the most fascinating example is one-time revered icon of all economic gurus--Alan Greenspan, former Federal Reserve chairman, who in his heyday was held in unquestioned high esteem by one and all. During recent Congressional testimony, Greenspan stated that he had been right 70% of the time and wrong 30% (which is about 29.99% higher than he previously admitted). Not exactly a mea culpa but a grudging concession that he might possibly be mortal.

Also Robert Rubin , former Treasury Secretary and Citigroup chairman muttered a few "I regrets" before the same Congressional committee but insisted that he was basically blameless for any ultimately failed economic policies or the tribulations of Citigroup which required life support from the Federal government. Rubin needed no such aid having been paid $126 million by that bank for his wise advice. Why admit you're at least partially responsible for Wall Street's problems--someone (gasp!) might suggest that you repay something?

Actually, it's quite fashionable today to blame the victim for anything you may have done--perhaps it is is everyone but these former Masters of the Universe (thanks to Tom Wolfe) who should be expressing their mea culpas.

Someone Must Care

In today's Too Much Information age (see blog posting of April 14, 2009) TNB often wonders just who cares about the relentless amount of needless tidings which we are bombarded with daily in every sort of media, whether newspapers, television and radio, the Internet (including the ultimate trivia explosion--forwarded E-Mails) and so on.

Obviously, the purveyors of all the many examples of TMI care and believe others do--someone must care, right? It apparently really matters to some people that:

• Barack Obama marked down "African-American" on his census form. Although it is arguable that releasing this information was unnecessary, sure enough, there was consternation that he didn't check the "multiracial" box. If you really care about this, TNB says "get a life" (in any hue).
• Jesse James (who TNB remembers from long-ago Wild West movies--or is this a different guy?) admittedly cheated on his wife, brand-new Oscar winner Sandra Bullock, with some heavily tattooed bimbo --thus rising from obscurity to become the bigger story, especially for those whose lives are so empty that they care about this.
• Tiger Woods, who was considered the ultimate athletic role model until last Thanksgiving when he overdosed on cranberry sauce and wrecked his car (and his image), managed on the eve of his golf return at the Masters to give the breathless public a little window into his self inflicted anguish. Please tell TNB that most of those who care about this story do so because of a fanatic devotion to his sport (golf, that is).

Perhaps what these and countless other examples signify is that we all need a form of release from all the frightening real-life things we should care about, such as the size of the Federal and State deficits, Ahmed Karzai threatening to join the Taliban, the ever increasing earthquake activity, and scariest of all, the Chicago Cubs losing their opener 16-5.

April Fools Day

As part of his ongoing program to protect his readers from all sorts of nefarious activities (see: The Tea Party), TNB hereby gives everyone adequate warning of what could happen on April 1-if you're gullible enough to believe one of the many hoaxes or practical jokes that might be attempted. One certainly doesn't want to admit that he or she is an April Fool (or for that matter a fool on any other day).

Some of the all-time best pranks (courtesy of Wikipedia) include:

• The 1998 report that the Alabama legislature had voted to change the value of the mathematical constant pi.
• The 1996 New York Times ad by Taco Bell announcing that they had purchased the Liberty Bell and renamed it (what else) the Taco Liberty Bell.
• The famous 1957 BBC report showing Italians harvesting spaghetti from trees (having eradicated that horrible pest, the spaghetti weevil).
• The BBC (oh, those Brits!) in 1994 stating that Big Ben would go digital.
• Annual National Public Radio (NPR) announcements such as the 2008 report that the IRS was shipping consumer products instead of cash for tax rebates (actually, for many near-destitute States this might work)..

Sadly, all of these hoaxes were believed, at least for a short while, by a number of people who forgot what day it was. Although these poor souls quickly figured out what was real and what wasn't, in our society today we seem to have a lot of perpetual April Fools, who believe 24/7 in the most amazing things, such as:

• Sarah Palin
• Glenn Beck
• Celebrity Apprentice
• All of the "ask your doctor" drugs advertised on TV (most of which today seem to include suicide as a side effect)
• The honesty of the Karzai government in Afghanistan.
• The chance of the Chicago Cubs winning the World Series (TNB is the April Fool here!)

So beware on April 1st. If you've been made an April Fool (even temporaily) please don't let TNB know. He'll be embarrassed.

Armageddon

Armageddon is of course the site prophesied in the Bible where the end of time as we know it will occur. For years, the term has been used as a synonym or description for cataclysmic events. The specter of the fearful Armageddon has been recently significantly trivialized by a movie with that title (where the final battle occurs in 2012, or is that just the next presidential election?) and by using it to describe horrible weather, etc.

Thus, it should be no surprise that "enlightened" Republican leaders such as Michael Steele and John Boehner have described the recently passed health reform legislation as "Armageddon". Why not further create a poisonous atmosphere (causing numerous threats against Democratic legislators among other problems) and whip up the "unenlightened" masses into a Tea Party and Fox News Channel fueled frenzy over a piece of legislation that will likely do far more good than harm?

Let's look at just what is so awful that the aforementioned end of time must be fast approaching. Although there can be legitimate debate over the stipulation(effective four years from now!)that everyone must purchase health insurance, albeit possibly with Federal Government assistance, how can anyone seriously believe that all Americans should not have reasonable access to health care? And as to the immediate reining in of insurance company overreach (insurance for children with pre-existing conditions, lifting of caps on total payments, etc.) is it possible that the vehement opposition is not really on ideological grounds but is largely due to the "undue influence", to say the least, of industry lobbying efforts?

Although the (televised) behavior of certain members of Congress this past weekend explains that body's 17% approval rating, the public (other than those believing in Armageddon!) has not generally reacted negatively. Polls are positive, the stock market is calm, the NCAA tournament is moving along, the baseball season will open soon and although hard to believe to some, life goes on. The end of time is not yet here (just wait until Sarah Palin is elected President).

BTW--an ugly postscript to the legislative maneuvers has been the re-emergence of the use of the "abortion card" as the major item of significance, no matter what the merits of the bill. Despite language to the contrary in the legislation, so called "pro life" forces have emerged from dormancy (abortion rates are way down) to engage in the worst sort of fearmongering possible. How can this be the major issue for so many when this country is battling recession, constant and increasing threats of terrorism, lack of quality education and yes unevenly provided health care? The answer is obvious--it is emotional, not logical -- an apt description of the Armageddonites.

Fame

Two famous quotes, each relating to the meaning of fame, are of course:

1. "In the future, everyone will be world-famous for 15 minutes" attributed to Andy Warhol in 1968 [today, shortened to his/her 15 minutes of fame].
2. "Glory [updated to fame] is fleeting, obscurity is forever" attributed to Napoleon Boanaparte in the early 19th century.

These 2 maxims have never been more relevant than currently, when in part due to the information explosion (Internet, Twitter, Facebook, etc.) and the so-called 24/7 news cycle, it is far easier to get famous [maybe for slightly longer than 15 minutes] as well as also to lapse quickly into often well-deserved obscurity.

Take for example one Eric Massa, recently resigned (in disgrace) New York congressman. Massa embarrassed moronic right-wing commentator Glenn Beck on a live program by admitting that Massa's well-documented groping of five single male aides he lived with (!) had nothing to do with his disillusionment with President Obama's health care program, which Beck thought he was exposing (pun intended). Massa has been mercilessly and steadily lampooned by every comedian but does anyone believe that by the end of 2010 his 15 minutes of fame won't have turned into obscurity?

For that matter, whatever happened to the Salahis? Only 4 short months ago, this faux-society couple certainly had their 15 minutes when they crashed the White House State dinner honoring the Prime Minister of India. So far, they haven't been charged with any crime, but if they're "lucky" enough to have this happen, they could get another 15 minutes (or 15 months in jail?). Otherwise, it's obscurity and in the apt words of another old maxim, they will become (perhaps) a footnote to history.

So the next time someone new bursts on the scene, likely for some sort of notorious behavior, TNB advises you to write their name(s) down and keep them in a safe place so that you can remember them if you care to (???).